I Did It!

When we moved to our new apartment, Cal quickly discovered a lot of fun things to do. Specifically, he discovered how fun it is to throw things down the stairs. As much as he loves it, we have strictly enforced a "no throwing down the stairs" rule.

Last week, I heard a small toy bounce down the stairs. I began to stomp slowly up the stairs to let Cal know that he was in trouble. When I arrived at the top, Cal ran out of his room holding his stuffed dog, Jellycat and shouted, "I did it! I did it!", as if Jellycat were accepting responsibility for throwing the toy.

Jellycat often "helps" us wash dishes, eat dinner, or put away toys. Now, it appears as though Jellycat has become Cal's personal whipping boy. Meg and I got a good laugh out of the whole thing. It's kind of hard to get mad at Cal when he does such funny things.

Being a Good Manager

Reed and I had a conversation recently, and for some reason, it really stuck with me. He was talking about his manager at work, and how good he is at "protecting the team."

When someone asks his manager what day they can have a project done, his manager takes into account everything that could go wrong, and gives a very conservative estimate. Instead of saying, "Yeah, we could probably have that for you in two days," he thinks about what would work best for the people on his team.

Reed says that these conservative estimates allow them time to make mistakes and fix them, work hard and efficiently but without extreme stress or unrealistic deadlines, and promotes good morale among his co-workers. We've also talked about how that is definitely a skill--one that I am not blessed with naturally: the ability to set people up for success.

I've been thinking about how this translates into how I "manage" my family. Do I schedule too much for us, or have unrealistic expectations about when we can be where? Unfortunately, the answer is often yes.

I have tried hard recently to be a good manager. I've tried to look at the three people in my little family and decide what is fair to expect from each of them, including myself. I ask myself, am I "protecting" my family from stress and frustration and exhaustion? Am I setting my family up for success?

This has affected how I've treated Christmas, too. The OCD part of myself just needs to say it: sooooo many things did not get done the way I had pictured them, or to the standard that I expected. But I can honestly say that I have worked every day to let things go, to let us enjoy the season (even if it means not getting something "important" done on time), and to not stress about the small things. Because those small things have a tendency to displace the really important moments in our life.

For example, I ran out of holiday stamps when I was doing our Christmas cards. I had two choices: use our Pixar stamps, or put Cal in the car and go to the post office for more.

For those of you receiving an envelop with Buzz Lightyear on it, I want you to know that Cal and I decorated cupcakes together instead of going to the post office. And although that didn't make for "perfect" Christmas cards, it was the right choice to enjoy time with my little boy.

I could give 10 examples like that, of ways that I wasn't "perfect" this year, but ways that made our Christmas season a little quieter, funner, and filled with more family moments, instead of errands and stress. In this way, I feel like I've been a good manager, like I've protected the team. I've let us make mistakes. I've let us not be perfect.

The funny thing is, the person I most often have to protect the team from...is me! But I feel like I have done it this month, and it has made for a joyful, imperfect Christmas season.

And I wish you all the same.

Snakes and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails

Each week, Cal and I go to a playgroup with the other young kids (and their moms) from my church congregation. (For those of you who remember the great egg disaster from last week, Park Day was the activity we were trying to get to.)

I'm sort of in charge (an easily-replaceable kind of "in charge") of organizing Park Days, and as the weather started to get colder, I entertained thoughts of canceling it until next summer. I'm so glad the group decided not to do that. Now, more than ever, our kids all need to get outside! Cal is so restless and squirmy all day, now that we're not going outside as much. I know, I know -- all you Utah & Canada residents are probably freaking out at me right now. Yes, we do enjoy a much milder climate in California, but it's only natural to want to stay indoors when there is a chill in the air.

But for the last several weeks, I've bundled Cal up and we've headed out to a park with our friends. It's been a great way to let Cal wiggle and run and climb to his heart's content, and to let ME get some much-needed adult conversation. I really love Park Days.

The title of this post is related to the fact that, sometimes, I forget that I have a BOY on my hands. This week, Cal and the other boys found the only 20-sq-ft patch of dirt in the whole grassy expanse of the park. The discovery was followed by digging...

...digging...

...and more digging.

Of course, he found a stick:

When we got home, I had to throw all of his clothes in the laundry, and he got a bath -- so much dirt, everywhere!

Then, the party moved to the jungle gym:

Love seeing my little boy play with "the guys" -- and we love Park Day.

Living with a Two-Year-Old: Part 3

I've decided that one of the reasons living with a two-year-old is so crazy is that everything is extreme. Things are either really great, or really terrible. Two-year-olds don't do things halfway. I want so badly to remember the little things I love about this age, and I want to make sure I record the crazy stuff so I have good stories to tell his kids when he's grown up! For the sake of record-keeping, I thought I'd record some of the fun, and not-so-fun things Cal has been up to lately.

Cal knows how to work doorknobs now. It's funny to hear, first thing in the morning, the thump-thump-thump of his little footy-pajamaed feet as he runs across his room, opens his door, runs across the hall, opens our door, and comes over to the side of the bed. I sleep with my face next to the edge of the bed, so when I open my eyes, his face is always about an inch from mine. He waits very patiently for me to open my eyes, but the second they're open, he says, "Tup?" -- which means, "Get me water now please."

Cal imitates us constantly. It's crazy how much more you think about what you're doing when you know a little person will be doing the same thing in 3 seconds! These next pictures are from the other day, when we went to the running store to buy Reed some new shoes. After dad got his feet diagnosed, Cal decided he'd better check out his own measurements:

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: where do two-year-olds get all that energy. If I could harness it, and put it in pill form, I could live forever, make millions, and take on the world's problems. Here is Cal (still in the running store) running back and forth between the far wall and Mommy:

Cal loves to help. And yes, I'm using that word loosely. It is one of his favorite things to do. I'm not sure whether it stems from an independent streak, or if he's actually aiming to please, but he is insistent upon being right in the middle of the action when it comes to getting things done.

After a trip to Ikea:

Reed and I have a little joke. When Reed asks me how my day was, and I use the word "help" when talking about something Cal did, Reed automatically knows that it was a horrendous ordeal. For instance, the other day when we were making bread, Cal was a big help with the flour.

This next one goes along with "helping", but Cal really just thinks of it as fun. It is NOT fun for me, however. Cal LOVES playing with the dishes and water in the sink. I used to like it, because it always keeps him totally happy and busy for quite a while. But inevitably, he ends up soaking wet, and there is water all over the counter and floor. I'm torn on this one, because he loves it so much. Every time I say no, I feel like I'm a boring, mean mom. How about a bath instead, eh Cal? :)

We have a pretty good library system here in San Jose. I love it because I can request that the materials I want be delivered to our library branch down the street. Every time we go to pick up something, we go to the kids section and Cal gets to play. His favorite thing is the toddler computer (chip off the old block!). On a side note, it is scary how fast he has picked up on using the mouse and clicking what he wants. Kids these days. Cal also loves reading books, and I must give credit where credit is due: that love came from Daddy. Even when I've been too tired, or when I thought Cal was too young to even "get it", Reed has read multiple books to Cal every single night. They often read for so long, I go in to check on them. Reed patiently lets Cal choose which book he'd like next, and then reads it with voices, and asks Cal questions about all the pages. When I "sub" for Reed, it's hilarious: Cal will start doing something when I get to one of the pages, and Reed will come in and explain, "He's licking the ice cream cone. That's what we do when we get to the page about the letter 'i'." I love their little inside jokes, and I love that Reed [alone] has taught Cal to love reading.

Another not-so-fun thing: Cal is a picky eater. As I mentioned in a previous post, we are trying SO HARD to give him plenty of healthy options, and to cut back on the things he wants (like juice), so that he's hungry for real food. Here is a picture we took when the three of us went to Ikea. All he wanted to eat was his little cup of ketchup, so we encouraged him to eat his chicken tenders, too. Here's the facial expression we got in return:

Time for another good thing: Cal is a GREAT traveler. Whether by car or by plane, he is well-behaved and cooperative. Planes feel like an adventure to him, and while he wiggles a lot, he is quiet and containable. In the car, he reads his lift-the-flap book, or plays "Build a Train" on daddy's iPad. A great road-trip buddy -- so grateful for that!

(At the airport in San Jose, waiting for Daddy to pick us up)

Something frustrating: Cal will NOT let us take pictures of him. He NEVER looks up at us when we're trying to snap a photo. Just ignores us and keeps on doing whatever it is that he's doing. Drives me NUTS!

Cal is very sweet. He's always surprising us by running over to give a kiss, or handing me something I was looking for. Here is a shot of him handing me two yellow roses (that he's ripped out of a bouquet Reed had gotten for me):

He smiles and says "Teeku" (thank you) every time I get him something, without even being prompted. It makes me so happy to hear him say that.

Cal is very playful, and is always excited about playing a game. I took this photo in the middle of blowing raspberries to each other (I call that a "raspberry conversation"):

This next one still makes my stomach turn. It is SO HARD to get yourself ready, a two-year-old ready, a diaper-bag & purse ready to go, plus making sure Cal is fed and changed before leaving the house. This particular morning, I did all of that, trying to get out the door by a certain time to meet the other moms for a morning play group. I was rushing around upstairs (WITH Cal -- I still don't know WHEN he did this!), and finally, as we descended the stairs toward the front door, this came into view:

It's hard to believe that the photo above was caused by the photo below, isn't it?

My ace-in-the-hole, the activity I cling to as a sure-fire winner when I'm at my wit's end with Cal, is cooking or baking. He LOVES to help me put together a meal. And yes, I still mean "help". It is his favorite thing to do, but it takes lots of supervision. I'm okay with that.

Here he is making sugar cookies with his two friends:

I let him do whatever he wanted with the dough. We got a couple of good cookies out of it, and then he just pulverized it into little shredded clumps.
This is one of my favorite photos. He was working SO carefully, frosting his Christmas tree cookie. Then he picked it up, took a bite, set it down. And kept frosting with the same, careful intensity.

We love our nugget boy, but he may end up being the death of us. Who's placing bets? My money's on Cal! :)

Having Fun with Daddy

I'm so grateful that Cal has Reed for a Daddy. The reasons are many, but one that I've been thinking about a lot lately is the fact that Reed is good at being fun.

I am not good at being fun. At least not to a two-year-old. In general, I tend to be a very task-oriented person. I like a clean house and getting errands done. And unfortunately, Cal gets dragged around to lots of un-fun places in my quest to keep things running the way I'd like them.

I definitely play with him (my specialty is snuggling and tickling), and his needs are completely met, but Daddy brings something special into the mix. When Reed gets home, it is the most exciting part of Cal's day. The moment he hears Reed's keys jingling in the lock, Cal gasps, jumps off the couch and yells, "Daaaaaadddeeeeeeeeee!!!" Reed runs through the door and Cal races over to him, beaming. Reed picks him up and throws him in the air, and then they run upstairs and start some heavy duty playing with toys. I try to sit down with Cal and play with his toys, but Reed does it like it's the funnest thing he's seen all day. Cal shows him stuff, and they build things, and knock stuff down, and laugh and scream and the whole time I'm usually downstairs getting dinner on, grateful for the break and legitimately amazed that Reed can be so immediately and effortlessly fun.

The picture up top was taken a few days ago. Reed's mom sent us a very cool digital advent calendar that features wonderful little animated clips and Christmas carols. I had shown Cal some of the clips, but Reed got Cal's stuffed dog, "JellyCat", and pretended that JellyCat was controlling the computer mouse and picking the different clips. I thought Cal was going to bust a gut laughing. It was another example of how Reed and I are different in our fun factor. And lest you get confused, I'm not jealous, just amazed. And so, so grateful that I'm married to such a fun person.

SSVC Christmas Concert

As I mentioned earlier this season, I have joined a choir. While there has been unavoidable choir drama, on the whole it has been a fun, positive experience. Last night was our Christmas concert, and I feel like it went very well. Even the pieces we have been struggling with came together almost flawlessly for the performance, which left me both happy and relieved.

My supportive mom got a plane ticket up to San Jose for the occasion. She ended up being here just over twelve hours before heading back home. If that doesn't tell you what a wonderful mother she is, I don't know what will. It was so fun and meaningful to have her there in the audience.

I auditioned (and was eventually chosen) for a solo on a fairly large piece, and I felt like that went well, too. My conductor was concerned my voice wasn't large enough to fill the hall, so I practiced amplifying my voice over the weeks leading up to the concert. My aunt (who was forced to sit in the last row of the balcony for the first half of the concert) said she could hear every note, so I think I did my job!
Reed has really been "the founder of the feast" so to speak. He has encouraged me all the way, and hasn't blinked at any of the expenses that are part of being in the choir. I'm truly blessed to be married to a man who gives me wings to fly.

Here is a photo of all my Linebarger women: my grandmother, my mom, and my Aunt Heather, three of the most supportive people in my life.
Two things I learned from this concert: 1. Choir drama is a fact of choral life, and 2. my family is beyond amazing. I'm quite a lucky person to have so many loving people in my life.

Disneyland!

Just before Thanksgiving, Reed and I took Cal to Disneyland. We were so excited about it, but we were trying not to get our hopes up. With a two-year-old, you never really know how an activity is going to play out. Tantrums? Disinterest? Exhaustion? It's a gamble, to say the least. Fortunately, it turned out to be a very fun day.

The joke in the Richey family is that every one of us kids has been ecstatic just to ride the parking lot shuttle. My mom always wondered if she should save herself $300 and just let us ride the shuttle back and forth to our car. The picture below doesn't capture it, but Cal was no exception to the Richey-family-parking-shuttle rule. He loved it.

First stop inside was the Tiki Room, which my family lovingly calls "the Freaky Room", as it has frightened a couple of our younger members in yesteryears.

Cal loved the bright lights and the singing:

After the Tiki Room warm up, he was very excited for what was next. Here's a shot of him running to the jungle cruise:

When Reed and I were first dating, we went to Disneyland together, and split a Mickey-Mouse-shaped strawberry shortcake. We decided that if, after his mission, we ended up getting married, we'd come back to the same place and order the same thing and split it. I thought it was so romantic when Reed brought it up the morning of our Disneyland trip.

Then we got to the restaurant and realized there have been some cost-cuts in the happiest place on earth:

We had a good laugh about our tradition-in-a-cup. (And btw, it was still pretty delicious!)

Then it was off to Dumbo, which I haven't ridden for years. (For family members who remember, the last time was actually that rainy day where everyone in the park was wearing the same yellow Mickey Mouse poncho. Good times, right?)

Reed showed Cal how to control Dumbo's altitude:

Cal caught on and LOVED zooming Dumbo up and down.

Here is the one shot we got of the three of us (Cal is still trying to use the joystick):

Then it was off to Small World:

King Arthur's carousel (one of the only non-terrifying rides in Fantasyland):

Cal loved the submarine ride, which I have never been on:

Tomorrow land astro orbit. I got so motion sick on this ride (yep, I'm that cool):

Cal was ecstatic to see the train coming. He was yelling out "Choo chooooo! CHOO CHOOOOO!" when this photo was taken:

At this point, it was close to dinner time, and Cal's exhaustion was starting to show:

So Reed and I put Cal in the umbrella stroller, where he immediately fell asleep. Reed took me to dinner in downtown Disney, and since Cal was asleep, it felt like a night out without the baby! All in all, the three of us each had an awesome day (and night) at Disneyland.