Being a Good Manager

Reed and I had a conversation recently, and for some reason, it really stuck with me. He was talking about his manager at work, and how good he is at "protecting the team."

When someone asks his manager what day they can have a project done, his manager takes into account everything that could go wrong, and gives a very conservative estimate. Instead of saying, "Yeah, we could probably have that for you in two days," he thinks about what would work best for the people on his team.

Reed says that these conservative estimates allow them time to make mistakes and fix them, work hard and efficiently but without extreme stress or unrealistic deadlines, and promotes good morale among his co-workers. We've also talked about how that is definitely a skill--one that I am not blessed with naturally: the ability to set people up for success.

I've been thinking about how this translates into how I "manage" my family. Do I schedule too much for us, or have unrealistic expectations about when we can be where? Unfortunately, the answer is often yes.

I have tried hard recently to be a good manager. I've tried to look at the three people in my little family and decide what is fair to expect from each of them, including myself. I ask myself, am I "protecting" my family from stress and frustration and exhaustion? Am I setting my family up for success?

This has affected how I've treated Christmas, too. The OCD part of myself just needs to say it: sooooo many things did not get done the way I had pictured them, or to the standard that I expected. But I can honestly say that I have worked every day to let things go, to let us enjoy the season (even if it means not getting something "important" done on time), and to not stress about the small things. Because those small things have a tendency to displace the really important moments in our life.

For example, I ran out of holiday stamps when I was doing our Christmas cards. I had two choices: use our Pixar stamps, or put Cal in the car and go to the post office for more.

For those of you receiving an envelop with Buzz Lightyear on it, I want you to know that Cal and I decorated cupcakes together instead of going to the post office. And although that didn't make for "perfect" Christmas cards, it was the right choice to enjoy time with my little boy.

I could give 10 examples like that, of ways that I wasn't "perfect" this year, but ways that made our Christmas season a little quieter, funner, and filled with more family moments, instead of errands and stress. In this way, I feel like I've been a good manager, like I've protected the team. I've let us make mistakes. I've let us not be perfect.

The funny thing is, the person I most often have to protect the team from...is me! But I feel like I have done it this month, and it has made for a joyful, imperfect Christmas season.

And I wish you all the same.